alochana

yes Gods are crazy

acedia

with 4 comments

I think I am a fool. A fair case can be made of that, I think. Not in the grandiose sense that most of us fantasize about– like those crusaders for ideas that are ahead of their time etc– no, I think my foolishness is of a far more basic nature. Something that is trivially comprehensible, and hence, possibly the silliest.

A case, as an example illustrating this foolishness, is this incident during my +2. One fine day early in the morning, I felt like skipping the tuition class because I wanted to take a day off from getting drenched in the rain and pushing that stupid moped of mine through the rain for a couple of kilo-meters before even the Sun got up. I did. The next day the lecturer wanted to know why I skipped. He wanted to know if I was ill. I said NO. To this day I am not sure if I answered so because I believed that two wrongs don’t always make a right, or if I was lost in the logical maze that was the way out of the perceived wrongs… whatever I was honest, not in the bragging sort of a way, but in a sheepish way. The lecturer, in what I still consider to be a reaction a load of parsecs away from what would’ve been commensurate with my behaviour, possibly feeling that I was being insubordinate I am sure, told me that it is better that I stop attending the tuition if such were my attitude. I couldn’t figure it out on that day, I don’t fare much better today either. What confounds my sub-social intelligence is that I might be alone in limited company in so far as offering ‘laziness’ as an excuse is concerned, and that too, often. I find it strange that people can cite reasons for most of their actions. Most people, that I know, are irritated when I admit my laziness rather than think of some excuse. And I find it stranger.

I stopped attending that tuition. And that was not the only occasion that I had to give up something for such a reason. I don’t know if I regret that. It was not the last time. I don’t now if I should regret that.

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Written by kowsik

January 18, 2009 at 17:21

Posted in cribs, culture, life

4 Responses

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  1. Dude, think of it this way: what you term as “sub-social intelligence” may well be the grit to accept that you were, well, lazy. But since when did acceptance of procrastination equal foolishness In fact, I think this is in a completely different league. Perhaps you are taking a leaf out of the criticism of our Government, post-11/26; but see, I think scales matter when you talk of basic human nature of an individual to that of people who comprise this thing called State.

    I have come to one conclusion in life – I will do what I want, as long as I promise (myself) that I wont regret it, ever. However inconvenient it may appear to anyone else. And, yes, I was born Libran, if that is supposed to mean anything.

    On a side note, giving up is what we do best. When did you start regretting that?

    onechance

    January 19, 2009 at 23:39

  2. In a line, “I am confused.”

    Also, as can be guessed from the post, I am reading Dostoevsky these days. One of his theories is that we are animals that rationalize their actions, rather than beings whose actions are dictated by reason.

    Our government though, ended up KLPD’ing Pakistan by refusing to fight. That I think is an insult that even Pakistan can’t handle. As HSM used to say, “What do you do if you slap someone, and he doesn’t even realize that he has been slapped!”

    kowsik

    January 20, 2009 at 06:55

  3. “What do you do if you slap someone, and he doesn’t even realize that he has been slapped!”

    I laughed a lot when I read this with your context…
    but now I am wondering did I too accompany them in the realm of shamelessness?

    Painful!

    Archana

    January 21, 2009 at 08:31

  4. Sorry to spoil it for you, but I don’t think you fare any better than me. In fact your state is even worse, you don’t even dare doubt the reasons that junta peddle around.

    kowsik

    January 21, 2009 at 11:07


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