alochana

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Archive for June 2005

Vastramul…

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“Concentrate only on the Crow, for that is the only inhabitant of IISc from whom you know what to expect”
Ancient words of wisdom at the Indian Institute of Science, Bangalore

It was an eventful day, almost as if all the vicissitudes of life rolled into one. Nothing serious, I admit now itself, I am one of the first persons who hate to raise false excitement. It all started with a woman, a talking one at that. She was talking on and on about all the stuff that she had to bare…, and as any red—blooded virgin male on campus is known to react, I too was shocked. The immediate thoughts that ran through my mind were: “Why?”, “When?” and “Where?” (Not necessarily in the same order though.) My shock was mercilessly reduced into mere amusement when my good friend (you can choose to accept my apologies for not mentioning his presence earlier) pointed out that, considering the region that the lady comes from, the word used by the lady had to be wear. Quite a few unmentionable nouns (with appropriate adjectives) came to my mind, but there is not much that a man can do in such moments of sudden changes in the mood– to put it mildly, the mind’s control over the body weakens: a sudden surge of excitement, and then the dampener. Since that day, I have tried to find out if there was any person in the history of mankind who could handle such a situation properly; the more I think the more I am compelled to come to the conclusion that I missed the chance of being the first one.My friend’s free imparting of wisdom didn’t stop there (I knew at that stage that there were some valid reasons for his choosing me for being subjected to all his random BS theories, but couldn’t remember them then.) Not leaving me with such an elation-dampening revelation, he went ahead to point out that considering the state of (un)dress prevalent among both the sexes on campus, I had no justification for being shocked at the perceived meaning of lady’s statement (please go to the fourth line). Though the argument did seem to be a coup de grace dismissing me to the artificially lit confines of my lab, after some amount of thinking I succeeded in finding a fault with it. What has become the norm in the campus was the display of human bodies similar to some of these fighter aircrafts. The philosophy seems to be on the lines of: the more edges the better, when in doubt think Lara Croft and so on. This is not necessarily same as “bare”. Bare is like honest trade where the customer knows what he gets, but what we see is more like the Hindi movies.

Needless to say I went ahead like Abhimanyu did a few millennia ahead of me. Both of us met with the same fate. My good friend had the pleasure making a trap and finding it occupied with no great effort from his side. He immediately went on to condemn me and all the others who consider bare to be better than fake (for the want of a better word to describe imitation-Laras) for winning debates, but go ahead and stare the plastic out of the fakes while denouncing the bares. My feeble attempts at pointing out that since there were no known-bares on campus, I never had the opportunity to express my bare-related opinions, did not succeed. Arguments of the fakes being mortally hurt in the absence of a good stare were not accepted either.

For the rest of the day I remained wondering about what arguments can compel a person to package the God-given and technology-given features on one’s body for a vulgar display in public, and there-by ruin the happiness of innocent research students on the campus whose only crime being a quest for an intellectual debate on all matters under the Sun. May be the Crows have an answer, I should frame the question first. That reminds me, I am yet to have a topic my MSc and my good friend was supposed to help me out in that. That lousy…

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Written by kowsik

June 3, 2005 at 05:16

Posted in crow s**t, IISc